i got a bloody nose on the bus ride home today and now my stomach hurts and im whining.

at least i am home.  the excitement i felt to return here yesterday is dwindling and quickly fading away. geographical solutions are just that. useless.

nobody remembers me. 

i want mutual dependence.

mutual want.

if i'm going to be a shadow that walks softly behind the living; feeding off other people's excitement and fulfillment instead of finding my own happiness, then i wish at least another shadow would join me.

i am lonely. i am forlorn.